This week we received a great piece of junk mail... a free Chipotle burrito. So for dinner my wife grabbed herself a burrito bowl and a I got a Carnitas Burrito. Because I was starving after sitting out in the baking sun watching Calvin at the park I downed my burrito in like 85 seconds.
Uggg. I could immediately feel like something wasn't right, but I sucked it up and took Calvin out to his little yard pool to wear him out.
PHASE 1: nausea and more...
I forgot about my intestinal issues when I was outside but upon following the boy up the stairs to get get him ready for bed I could feel the color draining from my face. I struggled to get him in the bath and then went to my bed to concentrate on my heavy breathing. After twenty minutes of this I get the boy into his PJ's and we go down for his snack... as he's eating his cookie I make my dash to the bathroom.
Notes:
1. Food shouldn't be completely intact when it is coming back up. Next time I'll have think about chewing.
2. Chipotle is so good it makes for a solid reversal of fortune after taste.
PHASE 2: Green Cloud of Death
My stomach has now settled but now it appears that nasty bacteria are double timing it in my intestine. I have two statuses for the rest of the night... holding a fart and releasing a fart. After I'd moved across the room to spare Calvin (while I was reading to him) he turned his back to me and moved to the far side of his bed to try to avoid the blasts. I noticed that sitting on a wooden toy chest increased the farting decibels by about 30.
The wife entertained the idea of booting me to the couch. And said that she "couldn't drink her water with the nasty taste that was in the air." bahahaa.
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